If I had more time I would ...

* Make more stuff that I like and think about often like;

• recycled clothing into soft toys, bags, jewellery, bookcovers and kids clothes;
• more creative journalling (blogging is limited, I wanna play with other media like paint, crayons, lino printing, and collage);
• Fill my art workbooks more with all the stuff I collect and see that inspires me including sitting in nature and drawing;
• make cool baby stuff for Knuckles (due 13 December btw);
• fill up baking tins and make better dinners;

* Go to more intensives and workshops to get concentrated fixes with talented artists;

* Probably have a tidier house (although that is not a given);

* Go thrifting more, finding secondhand bargains, garage sales, op shops, markets and school galas, and save us money (which I have not had as much time to do in the last two years);

* Learn to sew better and join an embroidery group;

* Finish my projects including a tivaevae;

* Learn Te Reo Maori;

* Sleep in more and not wake up tired and running on empty (which doesn't work at all if you are pregnant!);

* Be more available to my family;

* Be more organised (again no guarantee but dreams are free);

* Travel more;

* Write more

There's a reason why I write this which will soon be revealed. Change has been in the wind for a while. It's all good and all positive. I am tired of being tired. It is time to prioritise some things and GET REAL! for my sake and my family's.

I had to take a week off school this week as I was tired, stressed and feeling really rundown. Couple that with abdominal pains yesterday and last night, two hours sleep and lots of assignments due, I really needed to slow down. And so I did. Sat on the couch, watched "House" my favourite DVD series with Hugh Laurie starring as a Doctor with a brain and wit, drank copious cups of tea and did some light reading. I am starting to feel replenished. I need too. I don't want to be grumpy mum and wife. I am committed to self-care during this pregnancy, need to in fact, for my sanity's sake. It always seem simpler to see how others should live but I need this so much. To live at my own pace, surrounded by supportive and loving family and friends, and avoiding stress. Not hard with a great husband and a couple of kids big enough to fend for themselves with the basics.

How about you? Are you doing what you need to be doing these days? Are you taking care of your essential needs? Do you need to reassess your environments and commitments so that you are living your life FOR YOU AND YOURS? If you had more time .... what would you do?